Take time for yourself and get organized

Weeeeeeeeee, last 4 days, I have been rearranging my home.  As some of you know, for two weeks, I helped organize mom, in going through all she’s owned, in her VA home.  Making piles, for what she would take to Fla, throw out, sell, or give to Goodwill. 

It also meant, anything, going home with me, or that she gave me, had to quickly be brought over to my house, and basically, just dropped off in a pile ! The name of the game, was get her finished, and then deal with my own process.

And know, it wasn’t like I got to clean up my own home, before this all began.  Meaning, I didn’t get to go through and weed out my own stuff first.  So boy, has it been a true mess (to look at and even try to make a path). 

Know, clutter … Not only adds confusion into one’s life; it causes stress, and a person is less productive if surrounded with clutter !   Need help organizing ?  Call me, I’m for hire.  Love organizing !

So finally, after finishing up with her, last Wednesday, I was able to start on my own process.  And she left for Florida on Friday.

As one can imagine, to bring stuff in, meant, taking stuff out.  I first began on the kitchen.  Two days, to go thru all the cabins, to weed out my own stuff, and re-organize. 

My thoughts … I will never buy anything again (famous words).  Any item that I have “never” used, nor will “ever” use, I got rid of !  I actually took out 20 grocery bags of stuff.    I do not cook.  I basically need my coffee pot and microwave and refrigerator.  That’s it.  I would say, that I still left about 10%, that I probably should have gotten rid of; otherwise, what is left, I really wanted to keep (whether I ever use or not).

Next,  living room.  First it was the moving of the furniture.  My myself.  It all began, when a friend, said, they would love to have a console, that I have (and never use); where I was using like a table; but now, this person would like to do the same (he’s yet to pick up; but I was able to get it all the way across the room, by myself). 

Naturally, something had to go; I was adding, a lounge chair & a long 70 inch table !  Originally, I thought about getting rid of my wicker chair; but I think I’ll hold onto this, just a little longer.

It actually took me longer to decide, which of “my things from around the World”, would go back on each table, versus deciding, how I would arrange the furniture.   So that became a 1 ½ day process too. With 5 more grocery bags of stuff coming out !  I probably kept 20% of things that I should have let go.

Then I went into the spare room.  The most I got done, was move the furniture.  No new furniture will probably go in there, however, 2 things:  (1) I was tired of trying to climb by the bed, into a room, that no one could really use.  And (2), wished I could get in a book case, cause I had a lot of new dolls of my grandmothers, that I need to find a home for.  It may mean, eliminating lots of stuffed animals, etc !  I don’t know. 

My office.  Had planned to tackle that this morning.  But had to run out, and do another errand for mom.  However, since then, I have at least cleaned 3 piles, so I know what is in them, that needs to get done.  May not, at this time, do any changing.  But tomorrow, I look forward, to “finally”, putting in a full days work, since 2 months ago (me in Fla; then dad dying; then packing mom; organizing my home) !

FYI, talked to my mother today. After rushing me, with only 10 days to 2 weeks, in getting her all packed up, to move to Fla “now”, she tells me today, she will take her time in unpacking.  Know, she had no deadline to get to Fla, other than her own ! 

So I run around with my head chopped off for 2 weeks (not working full days with my business)… And now, she will complete her part, in leisure !  Don't get me wrong, I like to see jobs/projects done quickly (feel of accomplishment).  BUT THANKS MOM ! On a second note ... The fact that these boxes will be sitting around in Fla, not getting done, would DRIVE ME LITERALLY NUTS !  I'm glad I'm here in VA.

 

What to write about this week ?

Had 3 problems, at work, on Friday.  That sort of thing, slows me down, in getting my daily routine jobs done.  Come Friday, I was already behind on tasks from Wednesday & Thursday, due to using time in the mornings, packing my mom.  So I stayed up Friday night till 4am, to at least get Friday done.

3 more days, and I’ll have my mom all packaged, to move to Fla.  Hopefully, we can get it all done.  About ½ the kitchen, her bath, her bedroom.  Not too bad.  I took off packing her Saturday, cause I was so behind in my job !

This weekend, I worked on my Company Monthly Newsletter.  It was due April 15.  I got out today.  So 6 days late !

Not enough weekend to catch up.  I didn’t get my normal Saturday, 3^rd week of the moth chores done.  And I had 3 clients to do things for.  Needed to wash dishes.  And clean out my car.

I’m suppose to be in other room now, enjoying 2 of my favorite shows on Sunday night:  Army Wives and Client List.  I’m listening to them as I work, but I miss a few things, cause I’m glued into this computer.

Hoping in an hour, maybe I will go to bed.  In hopes of getting up extra early tomorrow, and maybe clean out the car !

Tomorrow night, going with clients, who have invited me out to dinner.  Tuesday night, suppose to go out with a GF to a meeting, but that might get cancelled.  Wednesday, I’m suppose to go to a Medical Coding Seminar, but I’ll have to wait and decide.

Thursday, I meet with a “Coaching Client”.  Helping them with smoking !

 

How was your past week and what’s your upcoming week look like ?

 

Handling the week after a death. A whole new life is ahead.

One of the best things to do, when you are grieving, besides, take a little time, and have a few cries, is keep yourself busy.  Either than, or reach out to someone else, who is having their own personal issues, and be there for them.  It’s what helps keep your mind clear and less focused on yourself.

This week, I have been helping my mom pack the house, here in VA, because she is moving permanently to FLA in two weeks.  So each morning, I have been going there, and going thru things that have collected over the last 35+ years.

My mother is not a “things” person, so she is basically dividing up the items, among my brother and I, based on things we might need or want.   I’m the sentimental one (or the hoarder, like my dad), so I tend to want to keep all these type items.

Lucky for me, going thru the items and packing them away, has not bothered me in any type of emotional way.  But probably cause, I am focused on “getting the task done at hand”.

But there are issues, that have come up.  Thoughts that have come up.  Reality that seems to have now surfaced, now that my dad has gone.  Of course, most of these things, I will opt to keep to myself, at the moment.

However, one, I will share.  A whole new life begins for me now !  For most my life, I have always been real close to my dad.  I’ve made a lot of decisions, based on my dad (and my mom too).  And the last 3 years, he’s been sick, on and off, so I keep traveling, down to a minimum, in case I needed to run off to FLA instead.

My mother is a tough ol’ Joe, and she’s looking forward to her new life, alone.  So now, with her independence, that actually gives me more independence.

So now, what will I do with my life ?  What do I want to be when I grow up (know, I'm 54) ?  Lots to think about, but not all today.  For now, I need to get my mom all packed up, cause she leaves in 2 weeks.  Then I’ve got to re-arrange my own home furniture, cause my mom gave me many items. 

Then focus heavily on losing weight !  There’s my “internal reasoning” of why I have let this weight climb.  And yes, those reasons are no longer here !

 

 

 

My father - This week a tuff one

My father died this past Monday.  Sadly, couple weeks ago, he had that choice: (1) Fight to survive, or (2) Not.

He didn't give up.  He just didn't believe the choice was real, no matter what we all told him.  He thought he was fine.  Sadly, last couple of days, he finally told me, "I'm not doing too good".

He took a turn, the day, I left Fla to come home, now, couple weeks ago.  He kept getting pneumonia and it finally got the best of him.  Mom says, no idea what they will put on death certificate at this point.

Now, after planning so much around, him, for awhile, everything STOPS !  So, lots of changes up ahead for my life.  But for now, got to get my mom, packed to move back to Fla, permanently, in the next 3 weeks.

FYI, it still is yet to hit me fully !  With them living in Fla at least 6 months every year (this year, longer), it's so easy to think he's in Fla.

Couple times, I've already caught myself saying, "We'll have to tell dad" !

If you never think about or put your hand out for others, why would you expect folks to entrust in you

How do you perceive folks, who are either, only kind to you or speak to you, if you’re talking about something that interests them (only) ?

It’s truly sad !  I don’t know how these folks could actually consider them a friend, or a good employee, etc !

There is an establishment I visit regularly in my town.  I find the employees there, will only be nice to you, if you talk to them, about themselves (show interest in them).  So my GF and myself, are always trying to find something great, in talking with them, so they will be in a good mood, and actually treat you decently.  Sad ! 

And more amazingly, the establish keeps them on as employees !  They're always down and seemingly depressed, unless we try to cheer them up !  Shouldn't be our job in supporting their personality, but that's what we find ourselves having to do, to enjoy our own night !

I know other folks, who will only give you time of day, if you are talking about them.  They never ask you anything about you; how you're doing; hows your life ?  Matter of fact, they actually don’t know anything about others, cause they only focus on themselves; they don't know if you're dating; how your job works, etc.  I have friends, “and family” that fit in this category.

Not that life is all about me, but I find these folks are terribly unconcerning about others.  And they wonder why they are so unhappy.  Why they can't find true friends !

Life is about, having and showing concern and interest for others !  And when you focus on others and their needs and their concerns, you spend less time thinking about your needs and your problems !  That's how it works; keeping your focus off yourself and onto others !

But of course, since they won’t listen to anything that you have to say, you don’t have an opportunity to share this thought.  I really feel sorry for them !

Who can actually trust these types of folks !

 

 

 

Weeeeeeeeeeee, I’ve been gone away from home for 3 weeks, helping my mom and dad in Fla.  Now that I am home, it is hard to motivate myself to work.  Guess I am somewhat a little tired.  Lack of sleep, while sleeping on sofa, near my dad, in case he needed help. 

So my waterbed is feeling so good, I didn’t even want to get up on Sunday !  And with the snow falling outside yesterday, it made such a lazy day.  Though I never drive in snow, I had to run out and pick up some meds, and go to the grocery store.

After eating at McDonalds for almost a month for my class in town, and then in Fla for 3 weeks, eating my cousins good food, it’s time for a big time diet, starting today, Monday !  And I had planned to get up at 5am, to start work, but didn’t climb out till 6am.  And I have more than 3 hours of work, before my work day begins.

 

No plans for week, other than work !  How about you ?

 

 

Single do not have allotted time for sickness in their schedule !

Last week, my dad’s sitter came into work sick.  First she started with a sore throat, about Tues, and by Friday, she had a full fledged cold.  Of course, Thurs, I had sore throat, and  by Saturday night, I could feel her sickness getting the rest of me !

As a single, who has time to be sick !  There’s no one else to work in your place; get tasks done, etc.

All day Sunday, I was sick.  And feeling useless, since I’m actually here to help my mom with my dad.  I constantly pumped in the meds.  Of course, my brother and my cousin is here, so thank goodness, they are totally able to help with him.

If I could have gotten a plane ticket out of here, on Sunday, I would have left, in hopes of not giving what I now have, to my dad.  No such luck.  All booked up, and Monday, the cost was $500.

Today, Monday, I am better, however, it seems to come and go.  I’m sitting mostly outside, to keep my sickness away from dad, and cause the nice weather seems to make me feel better.

However, as mentioned, who has time to be sick !  And if I did, I can't stand it ! 

What’s your take on you and sickness ?